Wednesday, 5 September 2007

The Difficulty of Balance

For someone who has researched long and hard about finding a healthy work-life balance, I am amazed at how darn ****** difficult it can be! Now what I find hard is this: not actually doing things, because all that I have to do is actually easy and straight forward (well sort of), but it is the anxiety and adrenaline that wells up within me that creates the probems. On the one hand I am anxious because I am frustrated at not being able to do all I want to do as I am so inspired by the world around me. On the other I feel that I can't let all the adrenaline loose that builds up daily because I feel anxious. I find it amusing that even trying to be relaxed can be stressful! Somehow I think that computers create within me a sort of build up of energy that has nowhere to go. I love them and have to sit at one all day for my job, but I do try and get away form the screen when I can.

I have now decided to keep my bike at work and go out for a quick spin in my meagre half hour lunch break to try and dissipate this energy and loose a bit of weight!

Leading a SLOW lifestyle is not easy as a wage earner, commuter, husband, dad and creative thinker. In theory it should be so easy - I could write a whole book on how to. In reality I feel a hypocrite at not being able to be the green, slow, eco-spiritual being I feel is true to me.

Life gets in the way, and I have to deal with the demands of work, dripping taps, shopping, tax returns, watering the garden, darwing, sleep, and everything else. I love it all, but I just wish I could do it SLOWLY without getting anxious about it all.

Hmm, must dig out the books on creative visualisation, do my daily journal, pray, relax, ... etc etc etc...

Looking forwad to the day in London next week celebrating the work of Thomas Berry Earth is Community

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